After all if he’s going to act the part of McClown he might as well dress the part.

Just get the overwhelming sense of deja-vu and that this World Cup qualifying campaign is going the way of Steve McClaren’s doomed single campaign in charge. Uninspiring and lucky with that luck running out come the final reckoning.

But then it’s a sense of deja-vu that it’s just like Svennis and Fabio as well as the McClown.

As Steven Gerrard and Ashley Cole picked up their 99th cap each, it was just that feeling that nothing’s changed, nothing at all. As this game showed again that England players don’t need to perform, there’s no incentive to do so, no reason for them to put themselves out for the national team.

Roy favourites, as with the favourites of Fabio, McClown and Sven, know that it doesn’t matter how poor they are on the field they’ll be picked for the next game. Gerrard is guaranteed, well even more guaranteed than before with possession of the armband, as is Cole no matter that this fallacy of best left back in the world is looking more and more ridiculous – not even best in the squad. But come next year and the next qualifier they’ll both be there, bar injury or Tweet.

And when they aren’t picked because of injury or being rested or protected from suspension the understudies have no incentive to perform because they know whatever they do when the favourite is back available he’ll be straight in.

And so we get games that the one we had yesterday evening.

A game where England couldn’t have looked much worse if they’d gone ahead with the game on Tuesday night, ankle deep in ever increasing puddles. More chance of trench foot than looking world beaters.

It’s amazing to think the sight on Tuesday night, as the rains fell in the Warsaw National Stadium, through the open roof, of the FIFA appointed referee throwing a ball to see if it would bounce on the paddy field, time and time again, wasn’t the most farcical thing that happened this week in World football. No it came fourth.

England’s performance was third topped by what happened to the U21 side in Serbia, as the natives reverted to type racially abusing England’s black players and then the Serbian officials blaming Danny Rose and UEFA charging England over their conduct. Farcical doesn’t quite touch it really, it’s beyond a farce and quite frankly you wouldn’t blame any England player black or white from going back to that country if fixtures work out that way.

So back to the fiasco in Poland. Now this isn’t to denigrate the hosts but quite frankly they didn’t exactly set the world alight either. Good up until the final third then it went to pieces. But even with that it managed to put England in the shade.

Poland happy to sit back and let Lescott, Jagielka, Cole and Johnson pass it between themselves in the knowledge one of them would give the ball away and if not one of them then Gerrard would become impatient at the ball not coming out soon would drop deep and ping one of those Hollywood balls straight for a goal kick. Then if it wasn’t the captain it would be Carrick who over the last two games has given the ball away more times than you’ve ever seen from him.

At some points the ball reached Rooney where he would just give it away as Defoe just didn’t touch the ball what so ever. For the fourth game out of Roy’s 11 in charge, England managed just one attempt on target. Rooney’s off the shoulder number from a corner. Certainly the highlight of his game.

It’s coming up to a decade since Rooney really burst on the scene with his goal against the goon scum for Everton. And yet even with him moving into the top 5 of England’s all time scorers, he doesn’t look the part. Not long in he looks knackered and unfit and he just doesn’t provide any link up play. Back then he looked like the best player since Gazza, now can you really say he’s filled that potential for country. Had a golden spell when he first came into the England side but since then.

The White Pele? He should be up there with Ronaldo and Messi. But no, he’s nowhere near.

Here if he hadn’t been Wayne Rooney he would have had the hook a lot earlier than the 73rd minute and if he wasn’t Wayne Rooney he probably would be picked for the next game. But he is and so like all the big names he’s one of the first names on the team sheet. Unlike at club level where he has been dropped.

And so we’ll keep getting performances like this and if England actually do manage to get out of this group – one of the weakest about – they’ll limp out of Brasil after another embarrassing tournament.

Roy had the chance to change this but no he chose to follow the same well trodden path of his predecessors.

Poland 1 - 1 England

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As I’ve posted here before I wanted Roy Hodgson to be the England boss. I’ve wanted it for years, since Glenn Hoddle was sacked. You know when they say be careful what you wish for…

From the announcement of his squad and captain to watching this England side through this tournament to the changes he made and the utterances after each game, especially this last one against Italy. Enthusiasm is on the wane.

Roy’s come in for much praise because the squad seem a better group of tourists than at previous tournaments, especially the last World Cup debacle. But so much else that went on over this couple of weeks could have done by Capello. Yes Roy was hampered by injuries, players throwing strops and the fact those at his disposal aren’t that good never mind great but it still doesn’t mean he just had to mimic the previous failures of those that held the job.

It all culminated on the hour. What a predictable point of the game when managing by numbers.

Subs were coming on Carroll and Walcott. First name was right, needed someone who could at least try and hold the ball up from the aimless ‘ave it balls England fall into. The latter, well, Roy it’s only two games after his performance against Sweden, he’s got a lot longer to live off that goal and assist than just two games. Oxlade-Chamberlain should have been the one to come on instead. Walcott was back to standard fair with his first touch as he set off at pace and left the ball behind. Runner not footballer.

But then Roy got the players to be replaced wrong. It was all so predictable. Welbeck and Milner.

Yes Milner had run about, done a bit and was knackered but he still massively outperformed Young, who had been atrocious in each of England’s outings. Came through qualifying with goals and good performances but then Gerrard wasn’t about, he’s never had a good game with Gerrard in the side. Young should have been the first one for the hook and it should have come sooner than the hour.

Roy says he can’t blame those that missed the penalties. Well you can but he has to take the majority of the blame for Young being there in the first place. It makes you wonder if the players that stayed on only did so because Hodgson was looking at penalties.

Because joining Young as the other player that should have been replaced was Rooney.

He almost got through the previous game on the adrenalin of finally being involved. But he was poor and rusty. Here he was even worse and that adrenalin wasn’t there to carry him. Welbeck had at least put some pressure on the Italians when they had the ball, Carroll certainly did when he came on, the pair doing it would really have helped. Rooney chugging about didn’t.

So we have those ball humped up and Carroll nods on to a completely knackered Rooney. Everyone’s a winner. Welbeck would have at least had the place to run onto those balls, make an effort, put the defence under some kind of pressure.

So Roy did exactly what was expected because it was exactly what Fabio would have done, what Svennis would have done, what the McClown would have done.

Looking at the name and reputation of a player and not what they were actually contributing on the park.

Poor stuff from Hodgson followed up about his talk of this group of players going on, when so many of them should now be jettisoned. Consigned to the history bin of failures. But then most of them should have been binned before these Euros which should have been used to bring the kids through.

They just haven’t leaned any lessons from the last World Cup and what Germany did to turn themselves around leading to that 4-1 thumping in Bloemfontein and what could have been an even more embarrassing stuffing this Thursday in Warsaw, if Young and Cole hadn’t joined the ranks of Pearce, Waddle, Southgate, Beckham, Batty, Ince, Gerrard, Carragher, Lampard and Vassell in missing those penalties.

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From the squad he chose to the first starting lineup he put out to the formation they lined up in to the changes he made and the performance they put on he’s doing his best to shout this is all I’ve got.

Friendly away to Norway, the best that can be said for Roy and his team – it was just like having Fabio back. Oh and Svennis and McClown.

The starting XI wouldn’t inspire anyone but things were made worse by the fact Roy put those he picked in the wrong positions, to get the best out of them in the 4-4-2, 4-4-1-1 formation – though in many cases that wrong position was on the field.

Downing, why? OK so he put that decent cross in the opening few minutes, that Carroll should have done a lot better with, but after that was completely useless for the 85 minutes he bizarrely lasted. Baines at leftback was slated for not getting forward enough, which he hardly did, but with Downing staying wide there was nowhere for the fullback to overlap added to the fact Baines couldn’t trust Downing with any defensive duties – another area in which he’s completely hopeless. Put Young out there, he can cover back, and with being right-footed will cut inside allowing Baines to get forward.

Yes Young scored from the more central position but despite the glowing praise that came his way it was a pretty poor performance from him. The so called good link up play between him at 10 and Carroll at 9 was one way. 9 to 10 not 10 to 9. Bar two decent balls he didn’t give his strike partner any decent delivery. It wasn’t a 7/10 performance. But then he doesn’t play well for England when Gerrard is in the side.

So with Young moved wide left the place behind Carroll, if we’re going with those that Roy picked, should have been Gerrard. A midfield pairing of Parker and Gerrard is one of the main reasons for the inept display. Neither can tackle and neither can really pass with the guile, skill and ability required for such position. The Fat Spanish Waiter didn’t get much right in his spell at Liverpool but one was figuring out eventually that he couldn’t trust Gerrard in the middle. So he was moved up behind Torres. He hasn’t got the passing ability, he can’t play a ball without hammering it, giving the receiver little or no chance and so we’re left with the Hollywood, glory balls battered in this game as with so many before to no one in particular, just giving the ball away. And as was so expertly shown just before the break he can’t tackle without going over the top with a wild jump. Which on this occasion should have lead to a red card and would surely do in a competitive game.

Speaking of none tacklers – shouldn’t you have at least one in the centre? – we have Parker. Funny seeing him get rated as a 5 out of 10, with them blaming tiredness and his injury for the subdued performance. When the exact same displays were getting 7,8 or 9 during the league season. This is what he did week in week out for Spurs – when the myth becomes reality, print the myth. He doesn’t tackle, just runs alongside the bloke with the ball and gets lucky now and again. He can’t pass forward with any purpose and he just leads to the ball being lost by drawing the opposition onto centrebacks that aren’t really that comfortable on the ball.

It all leads to lost possession.

Just lucky that the Norwegians were extremely limited in the final third. As yet another of their attacks petered out to nothing. Green would collect the ball, run about the box – 6 seconds anyone? – as England would meander up the park, no body to give it to he remembered Roy’s instruction of not kicking it up to Carroll, he’d wait to roll it out to one of the back four. This would lead to a game of hot potato, between said back four Parker and Gerrard. As Norway moved forward en masse none of them had the passing guile to find pass, not helped by a lack of movement, so the ball would slowly find it’s way back to Green who would finally hump it up the park to give the ball away.

The English way.

So it would have better to have Milner in there. For all his faults and the fact no one apparently likes him, he can tackle and he can pass it forward. He certainly isn’t a winger, or even an inside right. This would have moved Downing to the right and one have been the one weak spot, very weak spot, compared to the number caused by the positions the players took up. As said Downing is useless in helping his fullback defend and on the night that rightback was useless in defence, highlighted more so when Milner moved off the wing and Walcott replaced him. No coincidence after that Riise started running things.

Here’s a thought how about using the centreback you’ve picked in the squad to play in that position instead of the centreback you’ve got in the standby squad? I know, revolutionary thought isn’t it. Shows the folly of leaving Micah Richards out.

The only other problem that leaves you with is Carroll, who started well, linked with Young – when as said went one way not the other – when he dropped deep and provided so good knock ons. Defended exceptionally well, being the main clearer of the ball from Norwegian set-pieces. But is just so damn slow and at times he just didn’t seem bothered to put in a run. A big problem with the strikers available. Of the speed merchants, there’s a reason Defoe was third choice, sometimes fourth choice at Spurs – under a manager who really likes him – Bent is just not international class, Crouch and Carroll just have no pace whatsoever.

Speaking of slow, Barry remember him, he was really slow two years ago in the World Cup, hasn’t got any quicker. Hobbled off injured after a really inept performance of just giving the ball away every time he got hold of it.

That brings us to the substitutions. As soon as Walcott came on the word pace was used and straight away he showed that pace. As he left the ball behind. He can run, he can run quick, he can’t run with the ball, especially not with the ball under any control. Oxlade-Chamberlain came on but was put in a central position that didn’t help as England were on the back foot, out wide he might have been able to do something.

A word should go out to Robert Green in goal. Congrats on playing a full game and not once throwing the ball into the back of your own net. Though he tried his best to make up for that by being caught out Pedersen corner that hit the woodwork.

One thing Roy has got right is when he says he’s looking to the future. Again he’s just gone about it the wrong way. 2012 should have been written off and used as the start of something not what looks like the end. Jettison the old guard bring in a bunch of kids, spend the summer and the tournament getting them started in some sort of shape to be ready for World Cup qualification and go from there to Brazil 2014.

But of course the media types who dared give Gerrard a 5/10 would never have allowed that…

Norway 0 – 1 England

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I’ve been struggling to figure out what Roy Hodgson is playing at since his squad for the forthcoming Euros was announced.

Is the list just a 23 – or 28 with the standbys – name resignation letter, or has he picked a squad that has been met with so much disdain to make it easier when England fail miserably. I mean with that lot if you’re expecting great things in Poland and Ukraine then there’s an email from Nigeria in your inbox needs your immediate attention.

I expect it’s the former. I wanted Roy to have the job, for years now, I wanted him to succeed but now I see the error of my ways because what we’ve got is the new boss… same as the old boss.

It’s the same old usual suspects, it’s the same old usual failures, it’s the same old usual picking players who are neither fit or in form, it’s the same old story, same old song and dance.

Yes Roy was hamstrung by certain players being unavailable, such as Walker who is injured. But other exclusions are of his own making. Picking Parker, who along with being vastly overrated and useless is struggling to be fit to play, in the squad and having Jordan Henderson who has been hopeless for his club, while ineptly out of his depth in his previous England outing as the standby. That’s why Carrick ruled himself out and can you blame him, being picked behind that pair. While they ooze about Spain etc. keeping the ball the one player we’ve got that can actually keep possession and pass to a team mate is expected to sit on the bench while either of them take the field.

Another are was the defence where Roy said it was a straight choicer between Phil Jones and Micah Richards. But why? Oh that’s why you’ve got Glen Johnson in there. There shouldn’t have to be a choice, Johnson shouldn’t go the other two should.

And then there’s Downing.

You’d think such a scholar as Roy would learn from history. Pick Downing and fail. He’s bringing great form with him ain’t he, no goals, no assists, no bleeding point. Adam Johnson, may not have been playing as much as Downing but when he did come on he created chances and scored goals. Lennon, same tired old clichés come out about final ball but it’s more about who hasn’t bothered to get onto the end of them for Spurs of late and the fact they never play him properly – we never get triangles and balls behind the fullback, no he gets Gerrard smacking cross field, glory, balls that make the little fella jump up to stop the ball going out of play and stop all momentum, or it’s simply just played behind him.

Brings us to Gerrard guaranteed his place now he’s captain. Here’s another one, win percentage with his club is nearly half when he’s playing than when he’s missing. No one pointing until with Dalglish’s dismissal from the manager’s job that Liverpool were on a good run and then he came back from injury and stopped it in it’s track. He’s got 90 caps NINETY! How many great games? Hell, how many half decent ones?

Can just see that midfield if Roy goes 4-3-3. Lampard, Parker and Gerrard. Remember when the ran past the midfield in the last World Cup for fun, well two of ‘em are going to be two years older and the other one isn’t exactly Usain Bolt compared to Barry.

Well Roy did get some things right, Rio Ferdinand shouldn’t be on the plane, what he and the media got wrong is it shouldn’t have been either him or Terry. It should be neither. Just look at the way Terry’s been destroyed on the pitch lately. Never mind the fact he’s a loathsome individual.

It’s right that Oxlade-Chamberlain is going you just feel it’s going to be like Walcott in ’06 where he won’t actually get on the pitch. Yes he hasn’t played that much but this tournament should have been the start of using such players with a view to having them ready for the next World Cup. A springboard, not a retirement home day out.

Roy seems to think this is going to be some last hurrah for the Golden Generation – you know the ones that have won bugger all while performing piss poorly for years – but can you see the other countries in England’s group, France, Sweden and Ukraine, quaking in their boots? It looks like a last whimper.

It’s just so disappointing, Roy could have been different, he could have been a breathe of fresh air but what we’ve ended up with looks like the kind of squad ‘Arry, Fabio, McClown, Svennis, Keggy would have come up with.

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As soon as it was announced on Sunday night that the F.A. have made their approach to the man they want to take over as England boss the knives were out because that man was Roy Hodgson and not ‘Arry Redknapp.

Now I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place here. Spurs and England fan. Club versus country. Do I want the best man to take the England job – well best man of those available as Guus Hiddink is the best man for the job – or do I want ‘Arry out of Spurs with a load of compo for the club.

So yes I’d like Roy to get the job, should have been his many years ago. Thought he was the right man before Svennis took it, Hodgson with Peter Taylor as the number two with a view to the latter taking over was the best option back in 2000. But then he was the best option but a year earlier and we could have saved ourselves from the embarrassment of the last people’s choice, Keggy Keegle.

And there’s the rub people’s choice. For that read media’s choice and player’s choice in ‘Arry’s case.

The media love ‘Arry. We all know that if the F.A. had announced that his name and not Roy’s the first thing they wouldn’t have brought up is the current state of Portsmouth or the relegation of Southampton. But with Roy it’s straight into his stint at Blackburn – who were in the mire before he arrived, he saved them from the drop when he took over but they were a doomed side whoever was in charge. And most importantly than that to most of the media types his time at Liverpool.

Beloved of so many on TV, radio and in print. They don’t mention his record was about the same as their hero Dalglish after the latter took over and he hasn’t done much better with over a hundred million quid splash out. No they tell us he struggled with the star players and ask how he’ll manage with those in the England set up. Well, why should he have to bother with them? It’s the best opportunity to bin them, after all what have they actually achieved for England? Certainly haven’t won anything. If this is the chance to finally get rid of the likes of Gerrard, Lampard etc etc then the F.A. have finally got something right. I mean you just know that with ‘Arry in charge it would have been a middle four, right to left, of Beckham, Parker, Lampard and Gerrard. Dear god, have we been saved from that?

Roy talks too much, he’s a tactician not an arm around the shoulder go out there and run around a bit kind of manager. The players will get bored as he goes over the tactics. Well bin those players, if they’re that stupid that they can’t see if they listen there’s more chance they’ll overachieve like Fulham and West Brom, than fail like Liverpool if they don’t, then good riddance. Let’s not forget Sir Alf wasn’t exactly the chummy type now was he but then of course neither was Fabio but he’s a dolt.

Then we’re told Roy doesn’t like criticism of his methods because ‘Arry just loves that. Haven’t you heard over the last year or so? Every boo, every question posed, dear old ‘Arry laughs them off with a smile and a jaunty quip. Why just mention to him that he’s a wheeler dealer and see in what a jovial manner he reacts.

What the media wouldn’t have mention if Roy was overlooked for their man, was Roy’s extension work in foreign leagues and in international football. While they’d big up ‘Arry’s one F.A. Cup success and getting Spurs into the Champions League – once, any chance on twice? – they would have overlooked Roy’s seven titles and two cups in Sweden. One title and cup in Denmark. Taking Inter Milan – where he’s revered even though it was only one year – and Fulham to a European cup final – though of course the McClown managed that feat.

So from the very start if he takes the job – and why would he turn down something he wants badly – Roy is going into a loser. If the first game isn’t a blinding success the media will be all guns blazing and ‘Arry’s stock will be on the rise again. But if he’d let ‘Arry take it, Spurs would be rid, ‘Arry would Keggy Keegle it and we could all be ‘appy.

Because as the people’s choice ‘Arry is more Kevin Keegan than Brian Clough…

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FA chairman David Bernstein was at the fifth round Cup tie to watch his future employee seal the deal on the England job. And didn’t ‘Arry do well.

The anointed one obviously decided that the way to cement the position was to mimic those that have gone in the past. So against the the domestic equivalent of Andorra or Macedonia Spurs struggled just like England do against such opposition with such regularity.

Added to that there was the change of formation, going to 5-3-2 so McClownish versus Croatia, and then the ultimate by channelling the spirit of Graham Taylor as the ball was aimed high in the sky. Ah that was the players fault not ‘Arry’s they took that decisions themselves. Players not doing what they’re told, perfect for the England job. While others running about headless chicken style, doing what they want offering nothing and giving even less, ah visions of Gerrard.

So with a number of the team injured or ill, Benny, Modric, Adebayor and van der Vaart missing here and maybe even missing the next league game, things were somewhat limited though I’m sure that Modric – who we kept being told Spurs missed the most – wouldn’t have made much of a difference in the game by straining his neck back to watch the ball fly over his head.

And that seems to be the rub of it all, on a bobbly pitch against a side of rough and ready clodhoppers, the highest placed side left in the competition decided to play down to the lowest placed team in the competition. Instead of going out and playing like Spurs they went out and tried to be Stevenage. Big fellas at the back and long hoofs up the park.

Why?

Tight ground so no wingers but wing-backs, one which never got forward and the other had so much of the ball but little end product. Now if Bale had started left and Lennon right, would it have been worse? Could it have been worse. Now Kranjcar isn’t a Modric like-for-like against top sides but this was third division (in old money). Why Parker and Livermore? The latter again outshining the golden boy former, who minced about far too much and then when he actually did something that involved going forward happened to be in just the right position to be offside when Saha’s bundling attempt hit him on the goal line.

Added to all this is the fact it’s being broadcast on ITV. And as we all know everything turns to crap on ITV. So in between the sideline interviews with the Stevenage manager (???) we get the usual guff about a classic F.A. Cup tie “terrifically contested”. As the commentators talked it up treating the watching public as idiots. Like the sideline interview crap this another example the Americanisation of sports broadcasting. No negatives. Nothing can be called what it is if it’s crap. Can’t imagine what foreign broadcasters were saying but I bet they weren’t so glowing in Spanish or Dutch.

Stevenage weren’t terrific, they were just third division crap they only survived because Spurs were third division crap as well.

Back at The Lane, proper team out – if available – proper pitch things will be different. But with these injuries could have done without a replay. Two really poor performances against lower league opposition, Bolton at home in the quarters. Name on the Cup and ‘Arry for England?

Stevenage Borough 0 – 0 Tottenham Hotspur

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Hours after being found unanimously not guilty of tax evasion charges Fabio Capello chucks the dummy and walks out of the England job.

Triffic.

Now a day later as before the case came to court everyone has ‘Arry as the next England manager, especially those ManUre players it seems. Now why would they want the team behind them in the league suddenly destabilized by losing their manager? I wonder.

Well we all know why Rio Ferdinand would want ‘Arry because he knows he’ll be straight back into the fold – triffic player, love ‘im – after being shoved out somewhat by Fabio. This was one of the few things Don Fabio eventually got right. And that’s one of the reasons I really don’t want to see ‘Arry given the top job. I can just see that first line up consisting of the past failures – midfield of Beckham, Lampard, Gerrard, Joe Cole with Parker in there for good measure. Though would he pick Terry alongside Ferdinand?

So yes John Terry has only been charged and is still innocent until proved guilty. Though as someone pointed out he is guilty of being John Terry. But for once the F.A. having finally got something right. They were spot on in removing the captain’s armband from Terry. They can’t go round taking the moral high ground while they’re captain is up on racism charges.

It was typical of Fabio to then whinge on about it being the wrong thing to do and that he’d been undermined by the F.A.’s actions. He just doesn’t get it, he never really has. And it’s not just lost in translation.

We’re finally shot of him. How many months too late? How costly?

Should have gone after the South Africa debacle. In reality shouldn’t have been in charge before then either. Strange that he has the best winning percentage of any England manager but that just proves that stats mean bugger all. England never looked like anything much better than they did under Svennis or even the McClown. Well for the most parts it was the usual suspects.

Now the hunt is on for the next lamb to the slaughter and back to ‘Arry. Well do we all remember the last time there was so much clamour for one man to get the job, from players and especially the public? Well they got what they wanted. Keggie Keegle. That went well didn’t it. The people’s choice. Then the last time it had to be an English manager we got the McClown. Learn from history people.

Stuart Pearce takes over as a caretaker. Well I once thought he could go on and take the top job after a stint under a more experienced boss. Hmmm probably go that one wrong. We’ll have to see after the Holland friendly but wouldn’t hold my breath.

If they do go with ‘Arry they’ll have to wait until the season is over and it points up that does the England job need to be full time? What exactly does the England manager need to do for the vast majority of the year bar watch games every week. Which means that if someone does a club job as well it’ll mean they at least will stick around to the end of every game they watch. And at a club like Spurs what exactly does ‘Arry do on international week? Most of his squad will be off in various parts of the world. So why can’t he be off with the England squad. If he wants.

And we know he wants it, despite the post aquittal comments he’s made that he’s looking to the next Spurs game.

Moot point anyway. Guus Hiddink should have been given the job before Capello, before McClown, before Svennis saw out his dying days.

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The scene is set for Spurs’ home game against Fulham, you can just see it another scoreless draw, Martin Jol is standing on the touchline, arms crossed, chin jutting out and the crowd is in full voice… I love Martin Jol and Martin Jol loves me.

‘Arry is slumped in his seat, going a bit red and twitching.

Afterwords when asked about what happened ‘Arry twitchingly, angrily tells us that we’ve just witnessed the greatest display by a Tottenham side in history and that any fans idiots who didn’t like it should fuck off and watch Fulham.

While Martin has a smile on his big face when asked about the fans’ response to his return, even as a manager of another club says Noo… the fansh here are great, they were alwaysh good to me, it’sh a great club and we had some good timesh together.

Much has been made of the reaction of Spurs fans to the news that Martin Jol had been installed as the new Fulham manager. The outpouring of love for the big man was immense. And while some of it was over the top – going to supporting Fulham – it really showed how ‘Arry’s stock has dramatically fallen over really the last few months.

And there’s only one person to blame for that. ‘Arry.

It’s not been down to finishing fifth, all those draws, not being able to beat relegation fodder, no they haven’t helped but the main reason has been the way he dismissed any criticism coming his way by lambasting the descenting voices and declaring how great he is by giving us this great season.

So in the two full seasons ‘Arry has been in charge his worst finish, 5th, was the best place under Jol. BMJ got us to the quarters of the UEFA Cup, ‘Arry got to the same stage of the Champions League. Under Martin, bar one win against Chelsea, oh and a certain ref/lino combination robbing Mendes at Old Trafford, didn’t beat the Sky Top 4, whereas under ‘Arry that monkey – bar ManUre – has gone with not only wins but away wins against the scum and the scousers.

BMJ wasn’t any good at seeing out games, or using his subs but then ‘Arry has trouble in those areas at times. How many times are you saying to yourself about bloody time when someone is hooked only to follow it up with why are you bringing him on?.

After the disgraceful way in which Spurs sacked him – which is also a factor in the love shown for him – Jol moved on and another 5th placed season this time in Germany with Hamburg, then took Ajax to second in the Eredivisie, in the process scoring 106 goals while conceding just 20, with only 4 being let in at home. Now the first number will have come as no surprise the latter two do. But they came second to the McClown led Twente, that might say something about that league. He did win the cup though.

So does ‘Arry look to be the better manager? He’s got a better winning percentage, ranking 4th amongst Spurs managers to Martin’s 12th place, while taking the side over the line that seemed to be a stumbling block for Jol. Or are they roughly the same? Either way the main difference is the manner in which they conduct themselves, especially with regard to the fans, who after are what the game is really about.

So while Martin will take it all with a smile, a laugh, a joke and good grace, ‘Arry will be phoning up talkSport and gob off about those idiots.

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…all together now…I love Martin Jol…

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Not only that it’s still a Fabio led England, with much of the same dead wood hanging onto their places as competed with France during the World Cup for the worst team on show title.

Yup while the French saw their embarrassment in South Africa as a catalyst to rid them of the idiot in charge, one that had actually led them to a World Cup final, and kick out a bunch of egos masquerading as players. The F.A. chose the same state of national embarrassment to keep the useless bunch.

Which led us all to Wembley last night and the highly predictable England v France game. Because we all knew no matter how poorly France were during the summer, how far down the FIFA rankings they’ve fallen – 21st compared to England’s bizarre position of 6th – they would outclass their hosts. Because every time England come up against a reasonable team with players that can keep the ball and pass it to their own team-mates, it’s a one sided affair.

And so it was proved.

A shocking display by England, rightfully booed at the break, as when they weren’t having rings run round them by players in blue they were panicking into passing back so the centre-backs could dither about before the predictable aimless hoof up the park. Nominally in the area of Andy Carroll, most got nowhere near him. But what more can we expect when Fabio thinks Jagielka is a right back and Lescott is an international player. The latter can’t be accommodated in a back pair with Ferdinand, the similarities are too much, from the dithering to those humps up the park to my personal favourite which was highlighted in glorious technicolor slow-motion as Gourcuff given plenty of freedom lined up a shot, gave it a bang and at the very last second 24 million pound man Lescott completely ponced out of blocking it. Pure Ferdinand style.

Ah Ferdinand, the lip is back, static as a lumpen leaden static thing when Benzema scored the opener. So the back line was useless, slightly better when Richards came on and Jagielka moved to his actual position but on the left Gibbs didn’t exactly excel.

Midfield was… was it there, saw Barry in the first couple of minuted try and win the ball back it was the most I’ve seen him do in an England shirt for quite a number of games, it was the only thing he did in that first 45 minutes before his replacing was met with cheers. Milner ran about a bit but is too slow for the winger role when facing a fullback with any pace. Walcott, well hardly saw the ball, especially out wide, did come inside for it a couple of times but when he did have possession he showed how far he’s regressed and that he just hasn’t a footballing brain.

Henderson, well much made about the number of youngsters and those not playing regularly thrown into the game because of players missing, well the French had the same number of caps on the field, players missing, youngsters and those not turning out for their club. Excuses. Well back to the Sunderland youngster, looked completely out of his depth, of course not helped by those round him, Barry doing nothing, Gerrard being in full “do you know who I am” demanding the ball mode and the defence kicking the ball repeatedly over his head.

Gerrard oh god here we go, all the usual crap from his fanboys on telly, as he did the usual, minced about giving nothing and going for glory, personal glory at every Hollywood ball opportunity. From the moment he took a very early free kick, you knew what to expect, though Graham Taylor would have been surprised because he didn’t pull up his socks before wasting the chance. Oh wow he chased in some balls and nodded the ball onto the bar once, well anoint him the new Zidane.

Carroll, all alone up front being forced to try and get on the end of all those aimless hoofs, if he gets there flicking them on to no one. Not his fault at all, all down to the delivery he wasn’t getting. When he did get decent ball he showed a bit. But with a big fella up there , who is good in the air and four wingers used the irony that France scored their second from about the first decent cross of the night, scored by Valbuena, who showed when he celebrated that he is barely taller than the corner flag. He’s a bloody dwarf, for christ’s sake. Nicely left to get into the box by Gerrard.

Substitutes made a difference, Young and Johnson showing more life than others, Bothroyd looked second division and of course Crouch did his job, second touch wasn’t it not first? Great surprise not that he scored as a sub or indeed it wasn’t against one of the minnows but that as a Spurs payer he didn’t end the game on a stretcher or hobbling on crutches.

To sum the game all up as the rain fell on Wembley Fabio might as well have hoisted a brolly and admit he’s just another McClown.

England 1 – 2 France

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He’s not English, he’s Dutch, can’t you tell…of course this was a bit back and I haven’t heard him for a while he could be German by now.

Yes the Football Association, the gift that keeps on giving are according to Trevor “yes this is a fence I’m sitting on” Brooking seriously contemplating turning the clock back to the glory days of 2006/07 and handing the England job back to Steve “how do you shay McClown” McClaren. The wally could be back prowling the Wembley touchline with his brolly.

Now with the way Leicester get rid of their managers I’m sure Svennis will be free shortly, why not go the whole hog and have them both back, together again like Fred and Ginger. Of course Svennis not being English negates that, unless he can pull off the accent, then I’m sure he’d fool them. Now who is good at accents and could teach him?

If it’s purely based on nationality I’m pretty sure Graham Taylor would be happy to put down the microphone to try and regain the mantle of England’s worst ever holder of the job. But does he have the credentials in the F.A.s eyes? Telling the nation that there’s “no doubt about it” on TV and radio pretty much matches up in achievement with winning the Dutch league, doesn’t it?

Even with that Eredivisie title last year and even in the unlikely event he’d won a Bundesliga title with Wolfsburg by the time Fabio finally exits, there would be no justification to handing him back the top job. Christ I’d be happier if they fell to their knees and pleaded for Fabio to stay if that was the only alternative.

And that of course is the rub if the person in question has to be English – a viable alternative.

Who is there? Sam Allardyce, would he want to leave his new job at Real Madrid? Well it would solve the problem of playing Gerrard and Lampard in the middle as they’d just spend the game watching the ball fly over their heads, I’m sure even that pair could manage that. On second thoughts I may be over estimating their abilities.

Steve Bruce? Would anyone really want to listen to him wining after every game, or indeed Lee Cattermole as England captain, well between suspensions. Roy Hodgson, poor Woy, I do like Roy, wanted him in the job years back, you have to wonder though what state he’s going to be in when this sojourn in Scouseland ends. Not that I’m blaming him for the ills at that club, it’s not easy to polish the turd Benitez left behind.

Martin O’Neill? Well do they count him as English? The F.A. didn’t like his approach last time and it makes you think that snub would stop him even bothering next time round. Proud man is Martin, not one to piss off, doesn’t strike you as a forgive and forget type.

‘Arry? Out of all the candidates he’s the only one that shouts out “pick me”. Which is alarming news for Spurs fans, yes we may grumble about his choices in this and that game, but we are currently where we are because of him. Which is better off than any of the teams managed by those above. But would he have to leave the club to take the England job? International break means there’s very few players at Spurs, most are away on duty with their countries. He’s watching the players week in week out, not like many off them are outside the Premier League is it.

I wonder what Guus Hiddink will be doing in 2 years time, pretty sure it won’t be picking Kevin Davies and Darren Bent up front for England.

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