England stop wasting Yorkshire…

…runs.

How bad are India at Test cricket? They had England one nil down, down and out, and walk away with a 3-1 series defeat with the most miserable displays you’ve seen.

At the end there at the Oval it looked like a case of the Indians weren’t even going through the motions. Get out, get home.

So finally all those runs of Joe Root and Gary Balance didn’t go to waste.

But it was funny, as Chris Jordan was rattling through the final wickets that England needed to wrap up the third victory on the trot all you heard about was Jimmy Anderson being the greatest ever bowler (&copy English media).

If this was the case then he would have got more than one 5 wicket haul during the series especially these last three matches. He wouldn’t be just taking 2 or three wickets here and there. Oh, but, but look at the average. Yes an average of around 20, it’s quite a miracle for him but if you look at the reality of why that was it’s not so special.

It was funny Ed Smith in the TMS commentary box was trying to talk Anderson up in the first session of a days play in the fourth test when he mentioned after Anderson’s first over that it was his nth maiden over of the series. This was a big deal but unfortunately for both Smith gave the game away shortly after Anderson had bowled the second over, also a maiden, when he slipped in that the batsmen hadn’t actually had to play at any of the deliveries in either over.

The highlights programmes shows the play and misses, with screams of delight from idiots like Mark Nicholas, they conveniently miss out the wide long hops that are his stock delivery. Balls that the batsmen have to just watch from a distance.

While Jordan, who should never have been dropped at the start of the series, pitches it up and gets the nicks to slip, Anderson is pitching it shorter and shorter.

If Anderson had half a brain he would undoubtedly be one of the great bowlers but even though he gets a wicket with a pitched up swinger he’s too dim to bowl the same ball again and again, as no matter how many times the Indians see that delivery they are useless against it, so instead of running through a side he picks up the odd victim here and there.

Half a brain and he would know what is required. He was given every advantage this summer, pitch, weather, opposition, new ball he should have been getting more than 2.5 wickets an inning. Bit of maths and if Jordan bowled the same amount of overs he’d be on 32 wickets for the series compared to Anderson’s 25. One is the opening bowler one is third fourth change.

But… but… he’s only three off Botham’s England wicket record. Yes but he’s bowled more overs than any other England bowler, with that amount of balls he should have passed the record ages ago, at least in this summer. Half a brain and he would.

Half a brain and he wouldn’t have been involved in the dim wittery of his supposed “sledging”, the level of which frankly sums him up completely. Burnley Bumpkin.

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